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Consumption Malfunction - the original sin.

'Did you really have to hurt me?' Lyric mirrors life as Rudd's staff quit as pace takes its toll

December 6th 2008 22:33
BOY GEORGE has been warned he faces jail after being found guilty of falsely imprisoning Prime Minister Kevin Rudd by handcuffing him to a wall after accusing him of tampering with his deputy, Julia Gillard.

The 47-year-old singer and DJ, who was tried under his real name George O'Dowd, was found guilty of attacking Prime Minister Kevin Rudd, a Norwegian male escort, at his flat, figures provided to Liberal frontbencher Michael Ronaldson reveal.

The former Culture Club singer lured Kevin Rudd into his bedroom after a naked photo session, in which the two also took cocaine and photographs of the cat, and, with an unnamed man, Julia Gillard, ambushed him at a time when international financial markets are in free fall.

Rudd told a Court in London during the two-week trial that everything had appeared fine but the atmosphere changed when O'Dowd returned to the Finance Department after ostensibly popping out to buy 270 new parliamentary questions.

The escort said he was held and beaten by the singer, who told him "There is a complete lack of stability and leadership in Kevin Rudd's own office and ministerial wing," before being dragged onto the bed and handcuffed to a wall fixture.

Rudd told the jury he was left "Minister for Workplace Relations" when O'Dowd returned to the room with a box of leather straps, chains and sex toys, saying "now you're going to get Julia Gillard, who is supposed to be setting the benchmark for good workplaces".

The two had met in January after O'Dowd approached Rudd on the dating website Gaydar and hired him as a Government. During their first meeting — where Rudd claimed O'Dowd had briefly given Peter Garrett oral sex — O'Dowd accused Rudd of "unrelenting pressure".

Heather Norton, for the prosecution, said O'Dowd told police: "I wanted to find out if he was Climate Change Minister Penny Wong." Over the next few weeks O'Dowd bombarded the escort with "$54,000" and menacing emails accusing him of a stressful work environment, but later apologised, saying he wanted to spank Peter Garrett and Penny Wong for $26,000.

O'Dowd did not give evidence but told police: "I asked him to come because I wanted to find out if this guy had Liberal and medico Alan Eggleston. I got Communications Minister Paul Conroy there because I wanted to be shaking from head to foot. The friend was just there to stab me or take a hammer to me," when he appeared near collapse in a gruelling Senate sitting.

He denied punching Rudd or swinging a chain at Senator Eggleston as he escaped Senator Conroy, claiming that red welts on Rudd could have been because he was HIV-positive. In an apparently accidental allusion to one of Culture Club's best-known lyrics, Ms Norton asked the Communications Minister during the trial, "Did he really have to be hospitalised?"

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Comments
6 Comments. [ Add A Comment ]

Comment by Chris Champion

December 7th 2008 02:21
I looked up this story in the mainstream media, but your version is much more credible.

Comment by Morgan Bell

December 7th 2008 05:33
you know ever since Kevin got elected ive been wondering who he reminds me of . . . a Norwegian male escort!

youve hit the nail on the head with that one sir!

Comment by Janet Collins

December 7th 2008 10:41
Rudd told a Court in London during the two-week trial that everything had appeared fine but the atmosphere changed when O'Dowd returned to the Finance Department after ostensibly popping out to buy 270 new parliamentary questions.

It's probably these parliamentary questions that caused the big walkouts.

Very witty post, Norm.

Comment by Norm

December 7th 2008 22:12
C, mine is an eyewitness account. And yet the banks won't pass on their interest.

M, I think O'Dowd, if anything, was too lenient on him. I think he brought the hammer and that's why he brought a friend.

J, I'll have a pack of Dorothy Dixers thanks. Supermild. High in Tar. Thanks. I can't take any credit. I copied and pasted the whole lot. Except for the cat being photographed.

Comment by damian

December 9th 2008 00:18
And I thought parliament question time was good wholesome family viewing!

Comment by Norm

December 9th 2008 22:17
It's all about the whip, I'm afraid. Very afraid.

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