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Consumption Malfunction - reader's indigestion

Embittered boggler Norm has spoken up about the looming crisis farcing the anklish languages in the wake of the dearth of indecent waiters.

"I'm a real nut-picker when it comes to waiters dotting their toes and crossing their eyes," the cross-eyed madman told his anal cyst.

Sporting pink-painted toenails and noticeably looking at the pong of his nose, Norm insists he's not a crass-drosser.

"Writhing should be fun," he noted as he removed a pencil from his pancreas.

"Not something that causes pride in simpering correctness," he scolded as he dropped a kettle over his head.

The battle for the right to righteousness is set to snail on.

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