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Games Nutty - Consumption Malfunction

Threat of air strikes during Pope visit

June 22nd 2008 02:24

The Jews are poised to attack sinful city of sunny Sydney as the Pope takes off to launch attacks on World Youth Day.

"These measures are our preferred course of action," said one money-grubber as he awaits a messiah who has already left.

The train doesn't carry anyone, unhardly.

The Pope, chosen by God to represent his interests - financial and strategic - here on Earth, has asked God forgiveness for "not whipping them out when I had the chance."

We underpantstand he was stalking about a very naughty boy.

Sydney, a citadel on the rocks, is hoisting the unction - World Youth Day, to spread the weird.

The massage is the medium.

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Posted By: Norm - Category: Games, Poached, Sour, Nutty

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Talk about Apartheid bash

May 10th 2008 00:41

For he's a golly good fellow

One time terrorist and hero of the West, Nelson Mandela has revealed the guest list of his bathday bash exclusively to CM as part of his community service.

"When I was rotting in prison nobody wanted to know about me because I was a socialite, and then the Wall came down and suddenly the threat of a large black nation of socialites didn't worry the West any more, so they let me out of prison where I was sent for, of all things, being a terrorist," the Alzheimerish Mandela told the families of a host of dead black prisoners from the good old days.

Osama bin Laden, teleterrorist and concave-dweller, will, it is a secret so don't tell anyone, jump out of the cake and sing a rousing and extraordinary rendition.

Mandela's Molotov cocktail party will also feature pass the ticking parcel and pin the crime on the monkey.

The threat posed by whoreloads of Muslims is nothing like akin to that once poised by the same of enchanted apartheid sufferers.

"It's going to be a blast!" Osama shouted as the lighters went up.

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Posted By: Norm - Category: Games, Poached, Sour, Nutty

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Bec Cartwright Has It Off With Horse

February 26th 2008 23:42

In a bonanza for the paparazzi, home and away the best racketeer in the electrical circus, Bec Cartwright has told her father: "Gee, Pa."

After pondering her predicament, hot and heavy with a horse, Hewitt (nee Cartwright) needed to sit down in an esky full of ice.

"The equine was enormously erotic," explained an erratic Eskimo.

The poor horse had to be taken away in a hearse.

When asked about the affair the horse could only say: "Pal, I'm knackered."

Bec's father, bewildered by his daughter's promiscuity, has comforted his son-in-law, Lleyton by electing to receive.

"For me, he serves custard," he told the fans while sweating professorially.

Hewitt denies he's thick and rich.