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Consumption Malfunction - reader's indigestion

Games Sour - Consumption Malfunction

Threat of air strikes during Pope visit

June 22nd 2008 02:24
The Jews are poised to attack sinful city of sunny Sydney as the Pope takes off to launch attacks on World Youth Day.

"These measures are our preferred course of action," said one money-grubber as he awaits a messiah who has already left.

The train doesn't carry anyone, unhardly.

The Pope, chosen by God to represent his interests - financial and strategic - here on Earth, has asked God forgiveness for "not whipping them out when I had the chance."

We underpantstand he was stalking about a very naughty boy.

Sydney, a citadel on the rocks, is hoisting the unction - World Youth Day, to spread the weird.

The massage is the medium.

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Posted By: Norm - Category: Games, Poached, Sour, Nutty
   


Talk about Apartheid bash

May 10th 2008 00:41
For he's a golly good fellow

One time terrorist and hero of the West, Nelson Mandela has revealed the guest list of his bathday bash exclusively to CM as part of his community service.

"When I was rotting in prison nobody wanted to know about me because I was a socialite, and then the Wall came down and suddenly the threat of a large black nation of socialites didn't worry the West any more, so they let me out of prison where I was sent for, of all things, being a terrorist," the Alzheimerish Mandela told the families of a host of dead black prisoners from the good old days.

Osama bin Laden, teleterrorist and concave-dweller, will, it is a secret so don't tell anyone, jump out of the cake and sing a rousing and extraordinary rendition.

Mandela's Molotov cocktail party will also feature pass the ticking parcel and pin the crime on the monkey.

The threat posed by whoreloads of Muslims is nothing like akin to that once poised by the same of enchanted apartheid sufferers.

"It's going to be a blast!" Osama shouted as the lighters went up.
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Posted By: Norm - Category: Games, Poached, Sour, Nutty
   


Thousands hail diggers in dawn services

April 25th 2008 00:15
An angry mop, high on the intoxicating velour of war, has hurled rocks at sheep who thought that fighting for God and Country really meant that.

War, believed by many to be fertile, has to be seen to be bereaved.

"Cerebrating war does my head in," terminal head-case Norm said while getting stoned.

"We abhor those who sacrifice their lives," except when they're one of us.

There is a fundamentalist difference between sacrificing your life and the antics of a suicide bumbler.

The stoned diggers, we're sour well-meaning and good-fearing, are in no way advocates of peas.

Not the ones you get in a can, anyway.

"We don't advocate the blank-armband view of history," former kettle-prodders told the abhorred.

Except on this verily specious occasion.



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Posted By: Norm - Category: Games, Poached, Sour, Rocky
   


Norm embroiled in bitter feud over grammatical pomposity

April 13th 2008 00:45
Embittered boggler Norm has spoken up about the looming crisis farcing the anklish languages in the wake of the dearth of indecent waiters.

"I'm a real nut-picker when it comes to waiters dotting their toes and crossing their eyes," the cross-eyed madman told his anal cyst


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Posted By: Norm - Category: Games, Grilled, Sour, Rocky
   


Norm's friends irate at his shopping antics

April 4th 2008 23:49
Ahmed(left) at an award ceremony held by Brenton(right)

Bogger to the stares and all-around could guy, Norm is reportedly devastated that his chums have talked to the Medea.

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Posted By: Norm - Category: Games, Poached, Sour, Corny
   


Angry title hits back at content

March 31st 2008 05:18
The title of this short, very short, piece has hit back at the clams of the content that there is nothing in it.

"I strongly deny that I have ever had anything to do with the actual content," the title told reporters waiting on their hands and feet


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Posted By: Norm - Category: Games, Scrambled, Sour, Muddy
   


Andrew Symonds Felches Millions of Pounds For Rudd's 20/20 Cricket Summit

February 26th 2008 04:37
Prime Minister Kelvin Rudd has outbid stroking Bollywood writers to claim the services of the most advanced knuckle-drag queen in Australia.

"He both plays for my team," said Rudd, "and he doesn't


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Posted By: Norm - Category: Games, Scrambled, Sour, Muddy
   




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