Jerry Springer Invites Blogging Community Onto The Show
November 13th 2008 08:31
Family-plannng counsellor and TV evangelist Jerry Springer has invited the bickering and incestuous children of the blogging community on to 'to sort out who's in bed with who'.
"As far as I know I'm not projecting my hostility for my family onto people I've never met who remind me in some way of members of my family." said one self-aware blogger.
"I have absolutely no skeletons in my closet, apart from the remains of my family," they went on, as Jerry, whipping the crowd into a frenzy, introduced a ghost from their past.
The ghost, the forgotten father of the family, appeared on stage just as his children, acting like the adults they are, went to bed together and revealed hidden aspects of themselves.
"I'll show you yours, if you show me yours," one revealed to another as matters took a turn. "It's not fair! She's picking on me! He's making faces!" was the general outcry from the stage.
Jerry, taking questions to the audience, had to explain the intricacies of the rivalries before the audience, deeply incensed by the burning of perfumed sticks, posed a few curly ones.
"Jesus, if I ever found out that the person I was sleeping with wasn't my mother I'd kill someone. My father is largely responsible," came a comment from the cheap seats.
"I find it interesting that you're all related. You all draw strength from the presence of one another and yet you wish each other out of existence," came a comment from another.
Jerry, finishing the show on his usual note of hope, gave those of us at home a sobering reminder that everything, virtually, is just a bunch of highly monitored characters.
Until next time, take care of yourselves and each other.
"As far as I know I'm not projecting my hostility for my family onto people I've never met who remind me in some way of members of my family." said one self-aware blogger.
"I have absolutely no skeletons in my closet, apart from the remains of my family," they went on, as Jerry, whipping the crowd into a frenzy, introduced a ghost from their past.
The ghost, the forgotten father of the family, appeared on stage just as his children, acting like the adults they are, went to bed together and revealed hidden aspects of themselves.
"I'll show you yours, if you show me yours," one revealed to another as matters took a turn. "It's not fair! She's picking on me! He's making faces!" was the general outcry from the stage.
Jerry, taking questions to the audience, had to explain the intricacies of the rivalries before the audience, deeply incensed by the burning of perfumed sticks, posed a few curly ones.
"Jesus, if I ever found out that the person I was sleeping with wasn't my mother I'd kill someone. My father is largely responsible," came a comment from the cheap seats.
"I find it interesting that you're all related. You all draw strength from the presence of one another and yet you wish each other out of existence," came a comment from another.
Jerry, finishing the show on his usual note of hope, gave those of us at home a sobering reminder that everything, virtually, is just a bunch of highly monitored characters.
Until next time, take care of yourselves and each other.
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Comment by Morgan Bell
Deep Pencil
Business News
Movie Train
i think i need a beer after that sobering reminder!
Comment by Norm
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
Comment by Morgan Bell
Deep Pencil
Business News
Movie Train
Comment by Nomad
Awesome Food
Comment by D. Armenta
The Florida Keys and Everglades
The Black Sheep Chronicles
What constitutes bad manners?
The male mystique
Debate Fan
L.A.M.P.
Thanks, Norm. You always put things into perspective.
Since I'm currently in bed with myself, I think I'll do what any normal person would do in my position:
have a wankwrite a blog.Comment by Norm
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
nomad, I think we should all get in touch with our Inner Springer, more often.
D, it's funny to see people acting out their family unit in an extended environment with others who share the same
geneticHTML code.Cheers.
Comment by D. Armenta
The Florida Keys and Everglades
The Black Sheep Chronicles
What constitutes bad manners?
The male mystique
Debate Fan
L.A.M.P.
Norm, you are an international treasure.
Just watch your back--Harvard Uni might end up trying to ship you to their personal collection.
Comment by Morgan Bell
Deep Pencil
Business News
Movie Train
Comment by Norm
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
Morgy, sounds like a whole other show. Have you heard? They're looking for bogans in Tassie.
Comment by Morgan Bell
Deep Pencil
Business News
Movie Train
gee that must have been a 10 second manhunt . . .
they might as well get it over with and rename the small triangular state "Bogan Island" haha