Larry Flynt replaces Hugh Hefner as CEO of ABC Learning Centres
April 26th 2009 22:32
Larry Flynt, following in the slipper prints of unhygenic male senior citizen Hugh Hefner, has been voted in by the children in his care as the new CEO of ABC Learning Centres.
Flynt, possibly deceased or on holiday, had this to say at his first official function as CEO: "ABC Learning Centres are a community of children who provide an independent source of pornography for sexy men like me."
Flynt, brandishing a wheel chair, and possibly suffering from dementia, wore a funny look on his face when the children in his care began acting up.
"This is porn, not art," Flynt whispered from the sidelines, "If you two don't stop it, I'll have to separate you," he said, threatening to put an end to a sequence of inauthentic dialogue.
The dialogue, serving merely as a means to allow the viewers time to get a feel for things, has been seen to by none other than a man claiming to have come to clean the pool.
"I have come to clean the pool," the man, believed by some to be sporting a funny moustache, said. "Let me give you a quote first," he said, unfurling a hose. "I shall return," he said, doing a famous General.
Some children, their eyes burning, were less than impressed that the water they pee in on a daily basis is, as one put it, "so filthy", but many started up their complaining.
"I'm going to give you such a smack," one father said, picking up a child after a day on the shoot. "You like that, don't you?" the father whispered, "Bad girl."
Flynt, possibly deceased or on holiday, had this to say at his first official function as CEO: "ABC Learning Centres are a community of children who provide an independent source of pornography for sexy men like me."
Flynt, brandishing a wheel chair, and possibly suffering from dementia, wore a funny look on his face when the children in his care began acting up.
"This is porn, not art," Flynt whispered from the sidelines, "If you two don't stop it, I'll have to separate you," he said, threatening to put an end to a sequence of inauthentic dialogue.
The dialogue, serving merely as a means to allow the viewers time to get a feel for things, has been seen to by none other than a man claiming to have come to clean the pool.
"I have come to clean the pool," the man, believed by some to be sporting a funny moustache, said. "Let me give you a quote first," he said, unfurling a hose. "I shall return," he said, doing a famous General.
Some children, their eyes burning, were less than impressed that the water they pee in on a daily basis is, as one put it, "so filthy", but many started up their complaining.
"I'm going to give you such a smack," one father said, picking up a child after a day on the shoot. "You like that, don't you?" the father whispered, "Bad girl."
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Comment by Morgan Bell
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sometimes i like your middles, and sometimes your beginnings, but this time i like your ending
Comment by Chris Champion
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Comment by Norm
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I think you've caught me in the act of censoring myself.
I used to love kindergarten. I used to tease the other kids. The more things change.
I also loved milk. The sandpit. Buckets. Blocks. Painting the walls with water. Hometime. Yay!
Comment by Norm
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That'll be fore!
Comment by Norm
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The recession is imminent.
Comment by Morgan Bell
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no laughing
no smacking
there are very strict guidelines you are not complying with
Comment by Norm
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Comment by Morgan Bell
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Comment by Norm
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Comment by Morgan Bell
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I caught you out, howzat?
Comment by Anonymous
Mind you, it's about time someone preached to those kids about the dangers of condom use, and in hugh Heffner and Larry Flynt, you could hardly find two more worthy opponents of the condom.
Maybe they were working for the catholics all along.
Comment by Norm
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Lucky.
In my Thesaurus, one transplant for "catholic" is "liberal", so you never know.
It's okay though, I never knew either.
Comment by Norm
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Comment by Mau-Medellin
Mau-Medellin
Comment by Norm
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Very afraid.
Mindzle says that fear and imagination are entwined.
I'm happy to go along with that.
Very happy.
Comment by Morgan Bell
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ME!!!!!!!!
Comment by Norm
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I think it was a blanket.
Blankets rule.
Comment by Morgan Bell
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I say:
You're like a dog with that boner
Comment by Norm
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Anything for nice nails.
Comment by Morgan Bell
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i know you can make installation art out of yours, but im too afraid to do that, i imagine all the consequences
Comment by Mau-Medellin
Mau-Medellin
Comment by Mistersmith
MRS SMITH
READ THIS
SISTERS IN CRIME
This is what you do best, man.
Operating on so many levels. (Lit wise).
So many quotable quotes.
The imagery of:
It's hard sometimes to tell someone in a public forum about how much you appreciate some of their writing.
Even moreso in a public forum like Orble.
With everyone waiting in the shadows to jump on every word you write.
So I'll leave it at almost that. What a priceless post.
When I say at almost that? What I mean is, writers should inspire writers to write. And there is no better way to inspire a writer to write than go, that inspired me to write.
So I'll leave it at that.
Apart from this.
Because I'm not finished yet.
Now I've forgotten what it was I was going to write.
Hang on. Let me scroll up.
I've scrolled up. I've written everything I wanted to write, so I will leave it at that.
Comment by Norm
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Mau, there's so much I miss it's not funny. My mind is always elsewhere. Thanks for that.
Mistersmith, Writers should. Everything does.
The thing for me about "slipper prints" is how easily it could be "slippery prints". Or "slippery pants" or any other slight modifications opening up a myriad of other meanings.
It's the "other" meanings, that are not even there, that are interesting.
And the way words relate. Like avuncular! Just came into my mind. Then that goes to avuncular monkey. Then of course the mind must join that to "Monkey's uncle". Which I never understood when I first heard it. But the way that phrase spins its meaning? I mean, that's just that.
But it could have gone another way too.
It's all what's not there.
And on it goes....
I hate to sound serious so I'd better do a gag.
There goes....
Comment by Morgan Bell
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Stephen Fry
Comment by Norm
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Just make sure it's a nice restaurant.
Followed by a movie.
Eyes can be picky.
As the pirate said.
Matey.
Comment by Morgan Bell
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do you Twitter, Norm?
i bet Tom Cruise does . . .
Comment by Norm
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Comment by Lilla
From The Home Front
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Here*s the ting, I don*t understand a word of it,r eally, but it makes me howl with laughter, and it does inspire . . do you think I need a doctor?
Lilla ..
Comment by D. Armenta
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By the way: it's "a-vun-clee-ar".
Come here Normy, give yer old friend some monkey love...