Satan Signals Strategy: Set To Sue Says Not Sorry
July 20th 2009 01:14
Satan, goodness gracious, has called on all crass middle-aged white men of the world to file a class action against the Divine Creator.
"We know the difference between good and evil," Satan said, sucking all the goodness out of some shit. "We wrote the book on it."
Satan is threatening to throw the book at the Creator and take him to the cleaners with a suit so fanciful it makes Michael Jackson blush.
"I'm prepared to take everything but the shirt off his back," Satan said, hand on his his cold dead one. "Even if I have to lift his shirt."
Satan, liable to lift the shirt off the back of a string of suits, has every intention of convincing this world that he never even existed.
"I have an inflated opinion of my own standing," he explained, blowing up his wife with an explosive device. "The thing is, I'm always lying."
Satan, hoping like hell to face the Creator in a court of law, has every intention of tricking people into thinking there is no right and wrong.
"They're false dichotomies," Satan said, sharing his personality with the cult of his, "but that doesn't mean I won't be pretending I am."
Satan, pretending he doesn't exist, has pulled himself off for the last time, after slipping in the bath and pissing himself off, for good.
"The Creator pissed me off," Satan said, talking shit, "but only because I said I'd sue the shit out of him," he testified, eating his words.
"We know the difference between good and evil," Satan said, sucking all the goodness out of some shit. "We wrote the book on it."
Satan is threatening to throw the book at the Creator and take him to the cleaners with a suit so fanciful it makes Michael Jackson blush.
"I'm prepared to take everything but the shirt off his back," Satan said, hand on his his cold dead one. "Even if I have to lift his shirt."
Satan, liable to lift the shirt off the back of a string of suits, has every intention of convincing this world that he never even existed.
"I have an inflated opinion of my own standing," he explained, blowing up his wife with an explosive device. "The thing is, I'm always lying."
Satan, hoping like hell to face the Creator in a court of law, has every intention of tricking people into thinking there is no right and wrong.
"They're false dichotomies," Satan said, sharing his personality with the cult of his, "but that doesn't mean I won't be pretending I am."
Satan, pretending he doesn't exist, has pulled himself off for the last time, after slipping in the bath and pissing himself off, for good.
"The Creator pissed me off," Satan said, talking shit, "but only because I said I'd sue the shit out of him," he testified, eating his words.
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Comment by Morgan Bell
Deep Pencil
Business News
Movie Train
thats a very gay thing to say
a shirt-lifter would say that
theres only two types of people in this world: shirt-lifters and the women who love them
Comment by RubySoho
Music Zone
Thought Zone
I had no dea it was Satan convincing me he does not exist. I really must thank him.
Comment by Norm
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
Ruby, the greatest trick David Copperfield ever pulled was convincing the world he can do magic.
Further reading: Uri Geller's My Life In Pants, Chapter MCXXXIII
Comment by Morgan Bell
Deep Pencil
Business News
Movie Train
i love further reading almost as much as i love editorial comments
Comment by Norm
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
I love it when big trickers go out in a lot of smoke.
Comment by Morgan Bell
Deep Pencil
Business News
Movie Train
Comment by Norm
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
Comment by Morgan Bell
Deep Pencil
Business News
Movie Train
Comment by Norm
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
Comment by Morgan Bell
Deep Pencil
Business News
Movie Train