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Consumption Malfunction - the original sin.

Shackled teen tells gym workers he was held captive for a year in California

December 2nd 2008 23:13
With a chain round his ankle, a half-naked, bruised, emaciated and begging for help teen has walked into a gym, telling shocked onlookers he was held captive for a year.

"It's a new program that has plenty of merit. This boy is perhaps the greatest revolutionary since Richard Simmons," said the gym manager as he drew up plans for new facilities.

"I'm not sure about the begging," said one female gym member. "If a guy begs it's just such a turn-off. Usually I like chains on a guy. He just didn't do anything for me."

"To see a person in the teen's condition walking into a gym is something that you get used to after a while. I must admit, I didn't even notice him," said one eating disorder.

Californian Governor Schwarzenegger, a lifelong patron of the gym, was alarmed that they could let someone of the teen's social status in and immediately demanded a refund.

"He was half-naked, which is usually alright, but the half was above the waist. In other words, he had no shorts on. I can't believe they let him on the Ab-blaster 2000."

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4 Comments. [ Add A Comment ]

Comment by Morgan Bell

December 3rd 2008 04:27
i wonder if Arnie and Richard Simmons are best buds in real life?

Comment by Norm

December 3rd 2008 05:42
I don't see why not.
I wonder if Arnie thinks he will be able to take his money with him.
When he goes to Europe for a holiday.

Comment by Janet Collins

December 3rd 2008 23:40
Just wondering how Schwarzenegger knew what the teen's social status was?

Comment by Norm

December 3rd 2008 23:51
The teen was of the social standing that says that shorts are not on.
Arnie's very perceptive when it comes to those short on shorts.
He told me.
In a memo.
So impersonal.

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